What I really think about Anastasia Steele from "Fifty Shades of Grey"

Wow! It's been nearly a month since our last post. We must truly apologize to our readers. The writers of this blog are going through some major changes in their lives! Promise we will be back on track soon.

Now, to my post.

Warning: depending on what you call a spoiler, this post may or may not contain such.

So, about a month ago, I was strolling through Chapters. I came upon "Fifty Shades of Grey" by complete accident, without reading the part at the back that states that the book is modern erotica, and without realizing that I just set myself up for my first-ever-badly-written-fan-crazy-book-turned-movie-trilogy like "Hunger Games" and "Twilight" (I apologize if you found any of these stories exciting).


And I shouldn't complain. I'm on the second book, hooked on I don't know what. And it's not the porn. I never thought I'd get tired of reading porn, actually. But there is an overwhelming amount of it, so I basically just skip those pages at this point.

Anyway, perhaps I'm on the second book because I've been trying to give the storyline and Anastasia Steele a chance. I'm a very forgiving reader, believe me. But nope, it's not happening. There is nothing more to the story other than condoms, handcuffs, whips, chains, ties...and erections.

OKAY, NO MORE ERECTIONS, PLEASE!!! (On a side note, how the hell does Christian Grey get these 20 times a day with 5 minute breaks in between? I know this is fiction, but really???)

Also, Anastasia Steele is an extraordinarily boring and annoying girl. Anastasia not only doesn't possess a mind of her own, but her vocabulary is also sickeningly limited to Jeez! Wow! Holy shit!..and...That's so hot!


Anastasia Steele has the IQ of a seven year old, something that they have the audacity to call humor, and she gives strong, independent women a bad rep. Because she isn't one. (On another side note, how the hell does a virgin know what's HOT in bed if she has been living in a dungeon without technology or boyfriends, like Anastasia Steele?)

I shall say no more. And I will not speak about Christian Grey. Quite frankly, I wish that the book was written from his perspective about how annoying Anastasia Steele is. He seems to be the only character in the book that comes close to the definition of normal or interesting. And she calls him fucked up?


I rate "Fifty Shades of Grey" 1.5/10 (0.5 because it's at least suitable for my cardio reading), immense amounts of drugs and all the feminists rolling over in their graves.